The Daily Sandwich

"We have to learn the lesson that intellectual honesty is fundamental for everything we cherish." -Sir Karl Popper

Location: Boston, Massachusetts, United States


Thursday, December 15, 2005

Thursday Funny: Rep. Dingell mocks war on Christmas

And he does a pretty good job of it. The GOP-controlled House is doing its best to sustain the Fox-inspired myth that the 5 0r 6 percent of the American public who are atheists are on the verge of banning religion from the country. (But you can certainly see how they could manage an end-run around such lackadaisical Christian groups as the Christian Coalition and Focus on the Family.)

The idea was that they would pass a Resolution that would 'preserve' and 'protect' Christmas symbols from some unnamed enemy who has a grudge against stockings and snowmen, and the Michigan Congressman treated it like the farce that it is. Good stuff. Way to go, Dingell-Bells. And Merry Christmas.... if that's okay.

‘Twas the week before Christmas and all through the House
No bills were passed ‘bout which Fox News could grouse;

Tax cuts for the wealthy were passed with great cheer,
So vacations in St. Barts soon would be near;

Katrina kids were nestled all snug in motel beds,
While visions of school and home danced in their heads;

In Iraq our soldiers needed supplies and a plan,
Plus nuclear weapons were being built in Iran;

Gas prices shot up, consumer confidence fell;
Americans feared we were on a fast track to…well…

Wait--- we need a distraction--- something divisive and wily;
A fabrication straight from the mouth of O’Reilly

We can pretend that Christmas is under attack
Hold a vote to save it--- then pat ourselves on the back;

There's more at the Congressman's site. Check it out. I've mentioned before that I think more Democratic officials should hire comedy writers. With the GOP pulling clownish horseshit like this "Preserving Christmas" resolution, they don't merit anything more than derisive dismissal. Not to mention the things that happen when you pit a comedian against the likes of a Bill O'Reilly or Ann Coulter-- they're completely out of their rhetorical league, and the subsequent attempt to shout down the opposition looks all the more ridiculous. And I'm for hire, you Democrats out there.