The Daily Sandwich

"We have to learn the lesson that intellectual honesty is fundamental for everything we cherish." -Sir Karl Popper

Name:
Location: Boston, Massachusetts, United States

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Monday, November 28, 2005

California Rep. Cunningham pleads guilty-- loves Jesus.

Randall "Duke" Cunningham has decided to cop a plea for his various pay-to-play schemes between businessmen in his district and Washington. Plamegate heats up, the Abramoff/Scanlon lobbying scandal is coming to a head, and it's increasingly obvious to the public at large that the runup to war was a hoax perpetrated by the White House. Watch out for falling poll numbers.

SAN DIEGO - Rep. Randy "Duke" Cunningham pleaded guilty Monday to conspiracy and tax charges and tearfully resigned from office, admitting he took $2.4 million in bribes to steer defense contracts to co-conspirators.

Cunningham, 63, entered pleas in U.S. District Court to charges of conspiracy to commit bribery, mail fraud and wire fraud, and tax evasion for underreporting his income in 2004.

Cunningham answered "yes, Your Honor" when asked by U.S. District Judge Larry Burns if he had accepted bribes from someone in exchange for his performance of official duties.

Later, at a news conference, he wiped away tears as he announced his resignation.

"I can't undo what I have done but I can atone," he said.

Cunningham, an eight-term Republican congressman, had already announced in July that he would not seek re-election next year.

Tears are always good. They helped Jimmy Swaggart out of his sex scandal. All you have to do is picture yachts, limos, sacks of cash and Cuban cigars all flying out your window on little wings. He also manages to point out that he's a veteran and deeply religious. But why would he bother? He's finished.