If You're Feeling Sinister

The mysterious Cipher shares a site that some shadowy figure shared with her. Say what you will, you have to admire Fearless Leader's handlers when it comes to keeping him briefed on ancient Greek military strategy and 20th century bayou patois.

here's my inspired five point plan to wage war against this disaster:

1. Publicly restate the obvious.
2. Get my ass and a phalanx of photogs within inches of the Louisiana Stenchzone so that I can survey the brutal damage and humanity up close – but not so close that my dress shoes get scuffed.
3. Briefly struggle to empathize with the suffering of the victims, then give up, grit teeth, and find my special strong, silent "John Wayne" place. Hang loose there for a while.
4. Sell out the Federal disaster response agencies and bean counters I had four years to streamline. And by streamline, I mean "Play Three Card Monte With Billions."
5. Pray. Pray that folk will forget this teeny widdle environmental disaster toot sweet, and pray that we find more imaginary dinosaur bone sludge that we can whip into vroom juice.

The Onion it ain't, but we're all looking for a chuckle in a week when they're painfully hard to come by. Thanks, Cipher. The link, by the way, does have an inspired graphic of Fearless Leader making like Roy Rogers in front of a meteorological map, under the heading 'Competent Governance.' I imagine many of use are still too torn between rage and tears to enjoy even political saitre at this point, but we'll regroup soon and continue to take the fight to this administration.