The Daily Sandwich

"We have to learn the lesson that intellectual honesty is fundamental for everything we cherish." -Sir Karl Popper

Name:
Location: Boston, Massachusetts, United States

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Wednesday, September 28, 2005

Press Release: for immediate distribution

MATT SANDWICH DEMANDS END TO RAMPANT GOP SANDWICHISM

It has deeply pained me to witness the conservative assault on sandwiches in the wake of House Majority Leader Tom DeLay's indictment.

Popularized by novelist Tom Wolfe in his book 'Bonfire of the Vanities,' the claim that a good prosecutor could convince a jury to "indict a ham sandwich" is both hurtful and demeaning to this country's sandwich community.

In spite of a long and contentious history, sandwiches have earned a proud place in American society, and a rich cultural history that has often been marginalized with lamentable stereotypes: sandwiches are 'easy,' or 'cheap.' There are those who have long claimed that sandwiches are responsible for some abstract decay of Western civilization-- these individuals would suggest that sandwiches' longstanding identification with the working class and modernization are responsible for the breakdown of the so-called "traditional" American family.

In fact, sandwiches have made countless contributions to society. We've all seen photos of working men in the early 20th century with their sandwich companions as they entered factories for a hard day's work. Sandwiches are all but synonymous with the expanding middle class of 1950's America. It's only in recent years that some elements of society have begun to demonize sandwiches as synonymous with sloth, laziness, and poverty. While there will always be sandwiches that cater to the lowest common denominator in American society, it's important to remember that most sandwiches are honest, wholesome figures typically found in family kitchens and school cafeterias across the nation.

While the far-right elements of the Republican party find it convenient to villify sandwiches as a scapegoat to deflect unwanted attention from the questionable actions of a party leader, history will demonstrate that it wasn't a humble sandwich who betrayed the trust of the American people. Sandwiches are with us every day, in our homes and workplaces. They are models of diversity and acceptance. Within sandwiches are the elements of all cultures, and they deserve better than to be treated like kykes, niggers, or redskins.

-Matt Sandwich